Category Archives: lists

What I Talk About, Once a Born to Runner, When I Talk About Running

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See what I did there?

Here’s another round of posts that never were.

I was going to post a Footwear Dictionary of sorts that would put an end to the whole “barefoot shoe” thing: A picture of a sock, with the title, SOCK. A picture of a sandal, with the title SANDAL. A picture of a “barefoot” shoe, with a title, SHOE. A picture of a wedgie “correctional” shoe, with the title, MISTAKE. But, I figured that was too harsh; I’ve moved on from the “zinger” material. If anyone else wants to do it, go right ahead. You know how I feel about “Intellectual Property.” It’s something owned by a wiseguy.

Hey, maybe we should rename the “regular” running shoes WEDGIES. Just an idea.

I was going to bring up the whole barefoot coaching thing again, only to make the point that if I were to be in the market for a running coach, someone who was certified by Saxby would have a greater chance at getting my business. But that was my only point, so no post.

I was going to do a training update, but there’s not much “there” there. I’m not in official taper mode yet, but I backed off the mileage last week and will back off a little more this week. I plan on running at a marathon-effort pace for at least part of every run from here on out. That’s all I have to say about that.

Speaking of the Umstead Marathon, while I’m not ready to make an official time prediciton, I will announce one objective: to finish in the top fifteen, which will earn me a plaque. I want one, and I might be able to pull it off. Depends on who shows up, though.

Oh, and I’m letting my beard grow bushy for Umstead.

Then there’s pushups. Turns out if you don’t do any pushups for about a year, you’re not very good at them when you start again. And by “you” I mean “me,” of course. Funny, that.

Chariots of Fire is a mediocre movie at best. That certainly isn’t worth a whole post, although I could have done a review. But really, it’s not very good. No development, no dilemma. I made the observation on facebook that it would have been better as a witty comedy with the Lord Whimsywhatever as the protagonist.

I’m also too late to the latest “lotsa running vs little running (ah-crossfit-choooo)” debate between Robillard and MGBG. My two cents anyway: if you want to run a lot, you should run a lot. That’s what run a lot cultures do/did, like the Raramuri and the Navajo and the Ethiopians and the Kenyans. And that’s all I have to contribute. You see why I didn’t post that one – there’s even less “there” there than the other non-post.

Alright, that’s it. See you next time with another post of posts never posted. Until then, read my nonsense on Dailymile (column to the right). That’s where I’m writing the most these days, it seems.

Randomness to greet the new year

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Oh, right. I have a blog.

- The calendar has flipped again, which is as good a reason as any to wish each other happiness. That word has changed a lot, “happiness.” At least, I vaguely remember reading somewhere that a long time ago happiness was more about acting according to one’s identity rather than smiles and contentment. I could totally be making that up, though.

-For the first time ever, I have a New Year’s resolution. No road rage. I’ve been getting unnecessarily bent out of shape by the driving habits of others, which is not to suggest that I’m all Mr. Safety Pants all the time myself. It’s not just about the obvious benefits to myself and my neighbors, but it’s also a practice of perspective. Anger exists to spur one into action to resolve a conflict. If there’s no chance of resolution, there’s no point in getting angry. It’s a little life-lesson in a driving safety bundle.

- There’s a political website out there where I learned that shaving cream is BS. I’m not going to say what that website is, because I wouldn’t want you thinking I spend time with the brain plaque that is politics. I just find that the more unlikely the source, the better the grooming tip. Anyway, it’s true. Shaving cream is a sham. I can shave my beard with a cheap bic razor and water. No cuts. So can you (give it a try, bearded ladies!). Let me know in the comments if you need video evidence.

- No, I’m not going to become an anti-shaving cream zealot.

- I wore a pair of thick-soled sandals to pick up Chinese food this evening. I never wear them, because, of course, they’re thick-soled. But they were there, so I put them on and tried to judge them objectively, or at least make an effort to understand why I don’t like them. Part of it is the whole off-kilter feeling of being higher off the ground, not to mention the years of barefootery indoctrination thing. But what I think bugs me about thick, elevated soles is that it feels dishonest. I’m a short guy. Sure, as a result of my stature I may be less likely to get hired, wealthy, or dated (not that that matters anymore) than you lumbering tall people, but I’m way more comfortable in vehicles. That’s totally a fair exchange. Anyway, if I wear shoes that make me taller, I’m still short. So in those sandals I go from being a low-status, bottom rung, undesirable (but with plenty of leg room!) hobbit, to a low-status, bottom rung, undesirable (but with plenty of leg room!) dishonest hobbit, one who is trying and failing to trick others into thinking he’s (I’m?) less hobbitish than he (I?) really is (am?).

- Why yes, I am still running. I’m in what we’ll call a casual base-building mode. The plan is to peak for the Martinsville Half with a sub-1:24, be a pacer for some unfortunate soul in the Umstead 100 the following weekend, then peak again for The Scream Half with a sub-1:20. Needless to say, I’m feeling ambitious.

- Not just ambitious, but focused. In my office, I have these strips on the wall that hold paper. I had been using them for my art. Remember art? Yeah, me neither. It seems I can’t manage more than three identities at a time: running, writing, dogs. Sorry, art, no room for you. So down came the art, up went my racing bibs:

I'm going to need another strip.

- Fine, I guess cushioning has its place in footwear:

That’s all for now. I’ve got some things knocking around in the brain, we’ll see if any of them come to fruition. Tikity Tonk!

Goings on and updates, things like that

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- You may have noticed I’m logging my runs again, now with dailymile.com. It’s only sort of running related; the distances and times are guesses, except for the times I use the garmin (target pace runs, races, etc). I’m currently using it as a writing exercise journal, but I might ultimately write a novel in dailymile.

- Iris has a very prolific running life:
a) She is the Mastermind of the 12athon, a virtual run schedule for 2012: run 12 miles on the 12th of each month. You get points for completing that task in creative, unsafe, unappetizing, and unsanitary ways. There are prizes.
b) TOMORROW @ 1PM EST she’s moderating a Womanalist chat about women and bareshoes on Merrell’s facebook page. That’s right, BARESHOES. Shoes that are stripped BARE of unnecessary cushioning, rigidity, and immobility. There. I hope you like it, and we can all stop calling them “minimalist shoes.” You’re welcome. Anyway, the chat is what’s preventing you from taking the plunge? I have nothing to contribute, being a dude, and bareFOOT (see? no way to confuse the two. Man, I’m good).
c) Fifteen half marathons in fourteen months. None of them were as grueling, arduous, or exhausting as writing The Stetly Half Marathon Awards. I am in awe of your prowess.

- Fine. One more race. Iris and I and half the commenters on our blogs will be running the Pilot Mountain 5k on the 17th. I think this one will be humorously difficult and painful.

- I haven’t been following the drama that preceded it, but I second Bob’s call to replace “natural” with “innate.” Natural is just a word you use to sell a product to hippies.

That’s all I’ve got. Well, that’s not true. There’s more. There’s always more. But that’s later. This has gone on long enough.