To shoe or not to shoe is a matter of tradeoffs. Sometimes the tradeoff favors bare feet, sometimes a little shoe is the thing to catch the conscience of the king. The latter part of that sentence makes no sense, I know, but I guess I’m in a Hamletty mood. Words, words, words. Get thee to a punnery! What I’m trying to say is, sometimes I wear shoes and since this blog is more or less about my feet, I should take a moment to discuss the slings and arrows of outrageous footwear.
This is off to an awful start. Let’s keep trudging along anyway. Here’s what’s in my closet:
Merrell Vapor Glove
Frailty, thy name is shoe!
Let’s start at the end, or more specifically the last shoe review I will ever write. I have one-and-a-half pair left. No, I didn’t lose a shoe, rather my black pair are falling apart.
I still like them, but it seems a shoe that is minimal enough for my tastes isn’t going to be very durable. No big deal, I am financially and ethically capable of buying more, however I’m concerned they won’t be available much longer. Everyone seems to want more cushioning, which means us barefooters have failed. It was inevitable, even if you don’t consider the possibility that runners like me are freaks of nature to be able to run the way we do. Not a big deal for everyone else, but I’m concerned I’ll eventually have to go back to the WalMart aqua sock if I want a flexy-bendy trail shoe.
To thine own self be shoe.
These are doing a better job of standing the test of time, but they aren’t exactly in shape to be worn with a “business casual” ensemble.
Although I could probably get away with wearing them in a theistic event, given how holy they are:
These are still great for running, so long as I’m not running in wetness or steepness. If my feet get sweaty, I can’t run fast either without my feet slipping around inside the shoe. I mean, I can, it’s just an added thing to think about when my brain is desperately searching for excuses to slow down.
Luna Venado Sandals
There is nothing either good nor bad, but thinking makes it shoe.
I never reviewed these because, well, Barefoot Ted never sent me a pair and the only way I would write a review is out of a sense of obligation to the giver of free things. So I bought these to see how the straps compared to the strings of the Xero Shoe sandal (little bit the same, little bit different, whatever; it’s a slab of rubber strapped to the foot) and because I think they look cool on Patrick Sweeney. I really want them to work, and they do, so long as I have enough bandaids. Getting the snugness just right is a trial. Xero Shoes is coming out with an easily adjustable sandal too, which I’ll buy because Steven Sashen looks JUST LIKE THORIN OAKENSHIELD!
Merrell Trail Glove 2 and Road Glove 1
Give every man thy ear, but few thy shoe.
I gave away many shoes before the move across country, but decided to hang on to these. I’m glad I did. While both shoes are shoeier than I prefer, they are sturdy. As I said at the start, everything is a tradeoff; maybe it’s not possible to have a super-minimal shoe that will not fall apart in a few months.
Something is rotten in the shoe of Denmark.
I’ve finally figured out how to walk in the things. Running is not even close to an option yet.
Merrell Jungle Glove
But break my heart, for I must hold my shoe.
This is my “formal” shoe. I never wear them.
Okay, those are all my shoes. Good thing too, because I think I used up all the shoe-related quotes in Hamlet. Who knew it was such a shoey play? Now go, bid the soldiers shoe.